5 places where "SHIFT LEMME FAINT" would have appeared in the Bible.

5 places where "SHIFT LEMME
FAINT" would have appeared in
the Bible.
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**********************
NEW TESTAMENT
1. Disciple: master how many
times are we to forgive
somebody, then we stop
forgiving?
Jesus: 77×7
Desciple: u say?..please mattew
spray that your mat,lemme faint
on it.
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2. Man 1: are u not one of the
disciples of him (Jesus)?
Peter: me?,which man?..noo
Man 2: your face looks familiar,
we use to see u with Jesus..
Peter: I can see your eye is
paining you.
Man 3: excuse me,are u not the
fisherman, one of the followers
of Christ?
Peter; me,fisherman?, nooo, I'm a
prison warder..
Jesus: I said it,he will deny me
three times,when did peter
become a prison warder,please
can u people stop flogging me, I
want to faint for 2mins..
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3. Nicodemus: rabbi,how can I
enter the kingdom of God?
Jesus: you have to be born again.
Nicodemus: you mean I should
enter into my mother's womb
and be reborn?
Jesus: chai,..please shift for me..
Nicodemus: any problem rabbi?
Jesus; not really, I just want to
faint.
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4. Joseph: who is responsible for
your pregnancy?
Mary: an Angel ministered to me
saying I shall conceive by the holy
spirit...
Joseph: which angel?,I thought
you are a virgin?
Mary: yes I am still a virgin.
Joseph: a pregnant virgin?.. Can u
please lie on the floor..
Mary; what for?..
Joseph: I want to faint on ur
body, I can't faint on the floor,
I'm having chest pain.
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5. Jesus; one of you will sell me
for 30 pieces of silver..
Peter; it can't be me.
John: this one weak me.
Mattew: taa!,kamnukwa.
Judas; God forbid!!, it can never
happen..
Jesus; judas, u say??
Judas: I said it can never happen..
Jesus: lol.. Luke can u please clear
this table, the last supper is over,
I want to faint on the table...
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